mundane. august 23rd.

today was supposed to be easy. today was supposed to be a training shift with a girl that i like. followed by a drive to sucky store for paperwork on the way to delaware. with my new mix. and i am not short on beer or cigs or gas, so it would have been a cheap trip.

only crystal had other ideas.

what else is new?

some new ailment to require a trip to the free clinic. which is an all day affair.

so she sent a barrage of texts starting at about 930 this morning. telling me she has to leave, i need to go over and fill in until 3, when her shift ends.

really, she said i could leave at noon, but that would leave quinn alone on her first day alone, and i wasn't going to do that.

and i'm glad i canceled my trip, after i got over the annoyance and anger about it.

because i worked with quinn. actually, we cleaned simultaneously. because the store is filthy.

and this is why i know i made the right choice with her:

she was actually stating that our machine is unacceptably filthy. and that no one has been cleaning it. for a long time.

she proceeded to break down the machine (which we NEVER do) and give it an all-out scrubbing.

and while she did that, i had already started scrubbing things that hadn't been scrubbed since i scrubbed them a year ago.

and while i cleaned, i realized that i pay my employees too much. for no good reason. they're lazy and never find things to do when there's a lack of customers. and that i always do it, because they don't.

they leave early every day. and probably cheat on their timecards. because i'm too trusting.

but now that is resolved.

and tomorrow is lauren's last day. kit picked up the can of frosting i bought for her as a going away present.

because i made cakes for pam, i told her i'd make her a cake a while back. and she said she doesn't really like cake. just frosting.

so that's what i got for her.

i'll miss her. i am beyond sad to see her go.

and pam's first day doing paperwork went well. she's an overachiever. i think she'll do a great job as a manager.

now if i can just get rid of dan and crystal. all will be well.

once quinn starts bossing them around, i think they'll bail.

and if not, they'll be working for their money.

more writing about boring work. it's stupid.

kenna's coming in a couple weeks. so that is a big relief. it gives me time to get everyone in and in their roles, and to get the stores back in full swing.

like a well-oiled machine.

i'm almost out of the woods. and i'm glad to feel like my hiring choices were better than any that crystal would have made.

because i think that between her and dan, they would have picked people who they can dominate.

and let me tell you, quinn kept me on my toes today, and she's going to kick some ass around there.

and maybe someday... learn how to do what i do.

but it's too soon to be thinking that.

i figure in a month, she'll have proven herself, and be running the store. and then i'll mention it.

aside from work boringness, nothing else is really going on.

last night i was online for what felt like forever.

writing, chatting, scrabbling.

doing nothing productive.

but i needed a quiet weekend. and my quiet weekend is bleeding into a quiet monday.

everyone's got stuff going on. but i really don't. i mean, i smiled a few times today, thinking about where i can drag chalk. i want to do something other than hide in my apartment for four days.

i don't know what to do. i'm not good at this type of thing.

i looked at some hotels, but they're retarded expensive because of labor day weekend. like okay places for $400. and that's not even the nice ones.

there are so many little towns to go to. but the beach will be swamped, and he's not really a beach guy. i mean, he doesn't own a bathing suit.

so then i thought of maybe driving north to the mountains. but i don't even know what we'd do there for fun either.

all i know is that i'm going to have this guy here for four days.

and i don't know what to do with him, outside of bed/bar/restaurant.

he is content to just stay here. but after the ever scare following his last trip, i really like the idea of going away for two days and a night.

and not being in my apartment.

any ideas or suggestions in this department would be helpful.

i need to go back to researching.

intern texted me today.

i didn't know it was him, because i didn't have his number in my phone since i lost the contacts a few weeks back.

he was asking if i knew anyone who needed roommates.

and i made a bad joke back. and he didn't respond. then i thought, 'oh shit. i wonder if he thought i meant... oh NO.'

and i tried to think of a way to recover. then he responded and i did my best to clarify.

i told i would ask, but that i didn't know anyone. how is he doing. and said 'you trying to get sprung?'

meaning out of his parents house. but thought it could have been misconstrued.

and he said something about looking for a couple people to get out with. and i made another dumb joke about busting out of his parents house. and that i'd keep him posted.

so it goes.

i told him to tap into ever's pool of people, because they're always moving around and having rooms open.

any contact is better than none with him. i'll take what i can get.

and try not to make any more stupid jokes. especially that can be misconstrued as sexual innuendo.

i guess it's called a freudian slip...

and now? a walk with kit.

i don't know where we're going, but it should be good.

even if it is raining.

it's so cool out. there is that fall feeling on the damp breeze. and it reminds me that summer is fleeting.

i survived it.

i feared it. and i made it through it.

i guess labor day is the defining line, as far as resorts and things are concerned.

now i fear fall. because of falling in fall. from my previous life.

and i fear colder weather as i always have, because it means wanting to snuggle down with someone. when it was ever, i rarely did. it was a cold bed for a long time.

so i am trying to prepare myself mentally for wanting that again, and understanding that i might have it occasionally.

but that it's going to be a frigid winter spent under comforters alone.


  1. Thank you for going walking with me.

    And trying Cosi for the first time.

    And trying frozen yogurt for the first time. :)

  2. you are welcome. and i am thankful, too. it was nice. i like it when i try new things, and really like them.