post. april 9th, technically.

it has been an intense 24 hours.

and as much as i want to spill all the gory details of my first date, i'm sticking to my guns and remaining a lady. and writing it all down in paper journal instead.

sorry, blogger.

but know this.

it was fun.

it was super fun.

we were cracking like-minded jokes back and forth. talking smack, and talking life. i felt great, and he was complimentary enough for me to feel like he thought i was great.

we both said that we thought our first date was going really well.

and when i offered to drive him home, he said 'home or home with you?'

and i said, 'i'd take you home with me.'

and it was decided. that we would make out and stuff. and that he'd come home with me.

and at one, when i got out of bed to take my contacts out, i walked into the bathroom with SWAGGER. i felt liberated. i felt free. i felt happy. i was smiling so hard i started giggling in the mirror at myself. if i could have? i would have high fived myself.

and when i took him to his car at 630 this morning, i wasn't bitter. i was exhausted, sleep came in short little fits of lucid dream waves all night. and i sang at the top of my lungs smiling and shaking my head at myself.

and got back into bed at 7 for a three hour nap before work.

i had forgotten how wonderful it is to have a warm boy body in bed next to me.

and the spooning ratio was just right. mostly i think we slept apart, but there was some stirring arm draping and tiny kisses.

it was really really nice.

and though i'm feeling pretty good, also, about not being hung up on seeing him again soon, i felt pretty relieved when i texted him a joke that we'd been talking about last night, and when he responded a bit later.

if i never see him again, i'm fine with that. i'd like to, definitely. he was a lot of fun, and i think we liked each other enough to go back for seconds.

but i'm so glad that i am not like waiting to hear from him and crying because i'm not.

i took the bull by the horns, people.

and when i texted him after his response tonight, i ended the thread so there was no reason for him to respond.

in a while, depending on what else i have going on, i might text him again. another joke from last night. and just check in.

today was so crazy.

i know that if i keep saying that, it will lose it's power.

but really, it was.

because joey came by the store about ten minutes after i left.

i know... you've got to be kidding me, right?

but he did.

and told the girls to tell me he'd be by on monday.

i'm fucking beside myself.

i really like this boy.

and now, i shift from fearing dating site boy to hoping that joey isn't the one who somehow breaks me.

because i've wanted to go out with him for over a year. and i think it might just happen. like, this WEEK.

and because i haven't tried to push the envelope enough for one week, i am doing a couple other things i've never done in my life before. tomorrow.

i'm driving kit to a wedding in new jersey. because i went for a long drive the other night, to think and process and figure some shit out. and i really wanted to go to atlantic city. but didn't.

so this is how i get kit to a wedding, get a road trip out of it, and then explore. i'll get into manhattan somehow. totally alone. and wander around aimlessly for a few hours before heading back to pick her up.

i'm excited to go to strand. it's really my only goal. well, that and buying some cute underwear. because as of right now, i'm fresh out of cute underwear.

and if all goes according to plan? i'll be needing more.

funny. didn't have a reason before, and it is reflected in the choices in my top dresser drawer. now that i do? out with the lame and in with the hot.

tomorrow is going to rule. i kinda can't wait...

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