plan of attack. november 2nd.

maybe not literally, but...

to catch up.

yesterday was kenna's first day in town.

i went to work early, and then picked her up from the airport. we spent a lot of time talking about my personal life, not as much talking business.

she wanted to know how i am doing, what i'm doing, etc.

and i shocked the shit out of her when i said that i am probably moving to florida this summer.

i was afraid to bring it up, because i don't want her to worry about her business, and i can't help but feel like she'd be threatened by my leaving.

but we talked about it, and i think that as long as we have a plan in place, it will be okay. she wants whoever takes over for me to shadow me for at least two months.

this entire conversation took place yesterday, and after getting into receipts and things, i felt a lot better about the job i'm doing than i have been.

i've been fixing things, and making the stores operate more streamlined than they have been, so i guess i'm realizing that i'm doing a decent job.

today, we started off the day at suck store. i walked in, and cat told me that they opened the coffee kiosk. because the cafeteria hasn't stolen enough business from us already. we walked with landlord to look at the setup and listened to him talk about how many people come through there and how they saw it as a way to capture more business.

kenna asked a few questions, and asked if i had any. i just asked what changed between us asking permission to have a satellite location, and them not granting us permission, to them having the space.

he said something about us declining a space close to it, and that we only wanted the lobby.

we agreed on the way back to the store from there that he is a dick, and that it was wrong for them to do it, when we're already struggling there.

so we went back to the store. looking around, talking, and brainstorming ways to fix the business there and make it better.

then went to the store i work every day. and i was pleasantly surprised that she wasn't thrown off by things that we're doing there. she was complimentary. it felt good.

and then to the drama store, which was super clean and ready for her visit, and she had few things to fix there as well.

while we were there, we found out we had a meeting at suck store with the douchebag landlord guy, and his boss.

so we went back to suck store to meet with them.

seriously? it was the craziest meeting i've ever been a part of.

before they showed up, she asked what i wanted to hear.

and i said, 'honestly, i just want them to be honest. and if they want us out, which is how it feels, i wish they'd just say they want us to go.'

and they came in and sat down, and landlord's boss did all the talking.

and he said, 'it's fortuitous that you are in town. we want you to leave.'

hold on. wait. WHAAAAAAT?

i looked at him with complete shock. and she did, too.

he went on to say that they want us to move out, because they want our space for other things, and that it is not a reflection on who we are or what we do, who works there, or anything like that.

i stared at the wall, shaking angry. these greedy fucks are kicking us out? are you serious?

she wanted to talk it out, and put in her two cents, but i was ready to walk out after he said it. there's no point talking after that.

all i said was, 'it would have been nice to find this out before we lost a ton of money and killed ourselves moving this summer.'

the guy tony was the biggest dick.

he just put it so bluntly.

'you guys are in breach of contract. either you take the second space, or you leave. we both know that you'll lose money if you reopen that space and ride out the two years of your contract. so we want you to leave. and if you stay, we'll continue to sell all the same products you sell.'

it was so unbelievable. i had already told her before coming here that there was a rumor about the kiosk. and that she needed to see what was in our contract for no compete, and she told me that the default is to not pay rent and leave.

so i knew, i guess.

i felt it.

and i called it.

i'm impressed that she didn't cry. she's had that store since 1993. i've wanted to close it and use the setup where our other awesome stores are for two years now. since they put our contract on the chopping block.

in any case, she said that the doctors are going to flip, that we've been there forever.

they just don't care.

greedy fucks.

so it was shocking. we didn't really recover from it when we went our separate ways home at 4.

we have two meetings tomorrow, and the bright side of all this is that we can do what i've been wanting to do for two years, and move that setup into a space we already have permission to fill.

luckily this happened today before that meeting tomorrow. because now we can make that top priority.

it's scary to me. because i just went from running a company of three stores, down to two.

so i feel like my job was threatened for a minute.

but now i just have to turn this into a more lucrative thing, and redeem myself, and then maybe ask for a raise. because it's been a year.

crazy day.

so i came home, kindof dazed still. i just can't get over him telling us to leave, and basically threatening us with making it even harder on us if we stay.

and i ate some food.

and did what kit told me to do.

we talked last night, at the bar, over a beer. and she said i have to ask sam about the boy from friday.

because we had an entire discussion about making out with younger guys/crushing on younger guys, and that, if i'm afraid of peeing in the pool, then i need to also make sure that sam isn't interested in this dude.

she said a week is too long to wait to ask, just to go there (tonight) and ask her if she's interested in him.

so i was super nervous. but i went over. and as i was smoking before going inside, i got a couple texts from the writer about the book i sent him. i sent it to be borrowed, but i think he thinks it was a gift, so i guess i'll just get another copy at strand. he was talking about sending a book to me in exchange.

in any case, i went in. got a beer.

sat all awkward at the bar alone. again. only this time, there was no cute boy on my right having a ton of fun with me.

and she went for a smoke, so i said i'd join her, thinking this was my time to ask. and this guy who she knows followed us out.

so i couldn't do it.

and there i was, again, beating myself up. but i didn't want to ask in front of him.

so i went back in and finished my beer. and when she brought me my change, i did it.

i said, 'so that guy i was talking to on friday, tim?'

and she remembered.

'is he on your short list of boys?'

she was confused.

'we were talking about crushing on 24 year old dudes to make out with.'

and she laughed, and said she never hooked up with him.

and i said, 'oh, i just meant...yeah. i wanted to make sure you weren't interested.'

and she said she knows him through this guy and that he is a good kid.

that she had drinks with him once and went to a game with him.

which he had told me.

i told her that i had a lot of fun with him, that i liked him, and was he a nice guy.

she said he is a good guy, and that the guy he lives with is moving out of their place, and that she didn't know if he was staying or not. but that she would find out. and laughed again.

so i said goodnight. and left.

and was proud of myself.

i did it. and it went as well as possible.

and now, she will work a little bit of magic.

and i have a sneaking suspicion that she will mention my asking about him when he goes back.

also, i would like to add that hot bartender was there.

and i ignored him. didn't even smile at him.

and because of where i was sitting, on the end again, i saw him look at me a few times out of the corner of my eye, while watching arrested development without sound, and laughing, because i knew the episode.

do boys pay attention to you more when you ignore them? what is that about?

maybe i'm hypersensitive to my clark kent fake boyfriend. but i couldn't make myself look at him, and i almost felt like he was waiting for me to.

it must have been all those nights spent staring at him lustfully while he worked.

just like i sensed him looking at me tonight, he surely knows i just stare when i think i can get away with it.

something else:

when i came in from the cigarette with her, there were two quarters by my beer that weren't there when i walked outside.

i always put my coaster over my beer, and that was untouched. but two mystery quarters were there.

i asked two of my bartender friends if they knew what that was about. no one knew. so i gave them to sam.

i don't know.

i just felt so pathetic at the bar alone.

the only thing that made me feel better was sending the writer a text that said i'd have a beer at the bar alone in his honor, and his response that he was doing the same.

i wish he was closer. i think we'd be fast, lonely, drinking friends.

so now, i sit back, and with a completely clear conscience, hope that i run into that boy tim again. and that sam will tip me off if he shows up and asks about me.

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